


If You Ever Come Back

by redboarambo



Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-05
Updated: 2018-12-05
Packaged: 2019-09-11 21:32:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,303
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16860658
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/redboarambo/pseuds/redboarambo
Summary: Sam had breezed into her life and nothing had been the same since. Even when she saw what he did for a living, she knew that a part of her had changed for good. Not that she was going to complain or wish that it hadn’t happened, but things were different. That night, after he had left with nothing more than a goodbye, Sarah had thought that was it. That the man that she had just met and already knew she would never forget was gone.





	If You Ever Come Back

Some things had changed in eight years, but not everything. Sarah wasn’t going to try and lie to herself and say that she had moved on. She knew better than that.

But how she handled it was different.

Sam had breezed into her life and nothing had been the same since. Even when she saw what he did for a living, she knew that a part of her had changed for good. Not that she was going to complain or wish that it hadn’t happened, but things were different. That night, after he had left with nothing more than a goodbye, Sarah had thought that was it. That the man that she had just met and already knew she would never forget was gone.

When there was a knock on her door an hour later, she was surprised to say the least. She blinked up at Sam before letting him into the house.

That night, she let herself get lost in Sam Winchester. She let the easy conversation over dessert make her smile. She let all the little touches and kisses when they retreated to her bedroom make her feel things she hadn’t felt in a long time. When they finally fell asleep, both sated and sleepy and happy, she let herself get lost in his arms and just pretend that this was it.

One day. One day and her entire life was changed.

The next morning, she woke up to a note on the pillow beside her. All it said was “I won’t forget - SW”. He had promised to come by again some time, but Sarah knew, deep inside, that she would never see him again.

That day, it took everything in her to keep her head held high and to stop the tremors from wrecking her body. It was stupid, to feel so attached to someone she had only known for two days. When she woke up with him gone, though, that piece that he had altered in her broke a little. Maybe she had, deep down, figured he might stay longer. Logically, she knew he couldn’t. He had a job he had to do, a job saving people and killing things before they could hurt anyone.

The selfish part of her was pissed.

When she was around other people for a while after that, she held her head up. She could be dignified and classy, like she was raised. She would smile and laugh and go on with her life. It was when she was alone that she really let herself feel. She almost called him twenty times that first week, but she never did. Sarah spent a lot of time alone after he left.

Eventually, she moved on.

Not from Sam. She would never move on from Sam. But she moved on with her life the best she could. She started to smile and laugh more. She went out with friends and took care of her dads buisness when he got sick.

Eight years later, though, and her heart was still stuck in the past.

It had been a relatively nice weekend when it happened. Her friends had dragged her out to this new little bar-slash-restaurant that had opened, insisting that she never got out enough. It was well past nine o'clock, and she was on her third beer when she spotted him.

Her eyes darted to the corner of the building, where she could feel eyes on her, and about fainted. Shaggy hair, though it wasn’t in his face anymore. Bigger, his muscles more defined. He had an air of maturity around him, not the young adult that was barely out of his teenage years when she knew him. Everything was different about Sam, but it was still Sam. She knew instantly. Without thinking or debating, she slid off of her stool and moved towards him.

When he saw her moving towards him, he turned and edged towards the door. Sarah knew what he was doing. He was trying to escape before she made it to him. She wouldn’t let him, though. She moved faster, slipping out of the door before it close after he went through it.

“Sam…”

Her heart was pounding. Eight years. Eight years, but he was here. It made everything in her feel alive and humming from the intensity of it.

So much for having moved on.

She saw his shoulders sag as he let out a deep breath, before slowly turning around. The minute that his eyes found hers, she felt the breath in her body disappear for a second. One second.

“Sarah. Hi.”

As soon as he spoke, though, she took a deep breath. Then she did the only thing she could think to do.

Moving forward, she smacked the side of his head.

“What the hell? You disappear for eight years and just show up again?”

It was taking everything in her to not just wrap her arms around him again. To feel him once more and know that she wasn’t dreaming. She wanted to know that she was awake. Instead, she stood there, her arms crossing over her chest as he shifted on his feet. She watched as a hand raised, scratching at the back of his neck, his eyes darting around them. Always on the alert. At least some things didn’t change.

“I’m sorry. I… I didn’t know you’d be here. I just came for a drink. Dean left a bit ago. I..”

When his eyes met hers again, she could see the regret there. He felt bad about being there and her seeing him. She didn’t know if he felt bad for her, or for himself, but it made the anger in her body deflate. Reaching out with one hand, she went to touch his arm. He jerked back though, turning lightly so that his side was to her.

“I have to go. Sarah, I… I’m sorry. Take it easy.”

Just like that, he turned and started to stride towards the parking lot. She watched as both of his hands moved up, clasping behind his head. Making a split second decision, she coughed before raising her voice.

“Sam?”

He stopped, but didn’t turn around. She could see the way that tension rested on the tops of his shoulders.

“The house is in the same place. If you ever need a place to stay or whatever, just stop by.”

A long, silent moment stretched between them before he nodded, and started moving again. Moving towards his car. Sarah just stood and watched as Sam left again.

The next few days were hard, but she never left herself break down. No tears fell, her limbs never shook, and she didn’t isolate herself. She did better this time than she did eight years ago.

That didn’t mean her heart didn’t break, watching him leave. That didn’t mean that she kept a key under the pot by the front door, just in case he decided to stop by. That didn’t make her heart stop trying to get her to pay it any attention.

She had thought she was over him, but seeing him again… she knew now.

No matter how long it was between visits or accidental sightings, she would never be fully moved on. A part of her would always want that weekend back with him. It would always ache to be out there, traveling with him.

It wouldn’t change that, no matter how long he was gone, he would always be welcomed in with open arms. Cold shoulders, teasing jabs, silent moments, whatever he brought with him.

On the third day after she saw him, she sent him one text. One in eight years, praying to god he had the same number.

“They’ll be a light in the hall and a key under the mat, if you ever come back.”


End file.
